Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
(Source: nothingbutthedreams)
Slewyer's Shit
Piles of distasteful fecal matter
(Source: jangoharkness)
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
(Source: carlinmichelle)
Reality is frequently inaccurate.
(Source: green-eggs-and-hank-moody)
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
― Douglas Adams
(Source: specialk4y3)
(Source: brokensextant)
(Source: jaimeleschopsticks)
John Klein: I think we can assume that these entities are more advanced than us. Why don’t they just come right out and tell us what’s on their minds?
Alexander Leek: You’re more advanced than a cockroach, have you ever tried explaining yourself to one of them?
(Source: willowdoor)
